Sunday, 2 November 2025

Too Fat to Ride the Big Yins.

 Let's Begin - Time for an honest look at myself.

There’s a strange kind of honesty in cycling. The road never lies. Every climb, every turn, every gasp of breath reflects exactly where you are — physically and mentally.

At 268lbs and 5'11", the truth is plain enough: I’m carrying too much of myself up every hill. My BMI sits at 38, a number that feels as heavy as it sounds — morbidly obese. And yet, I’ve set myself a challenge that will demand everything I’ve got and more: the Glorious Gravel Kielder Triple Crown, a 200km off-road ride through the forests and fire roads of Northumberland.

The goal is simple to say, harder to do — finish within 12 hours.


The Machine

If there’s one thing that makes this journey feel possible, it’s my bike. She’s a Titanium Planet X Tempest, understated but unbreakable — the sort of bike that invites long rides and quiet ambition. She rolls on Hunt Gravel 35 wheels and runs a SRAM Apex AXS XPLR groupset, smooth and efficient even when I’m anything but.

There’s something comforting about titanium. It doesn’t complain. It doesn’t flinch. It just carries on. I suppose that’s what I want for myself — a bit more of that calm resilience, that silent strength.



The Reason

I’m 55 now. Old enough to know the difference between fantasy and purpose. But this feels like something more than just a midlife challenge. It’s a reckoning.

For years, I’ve coasted — too much comfort, too little control. But comfort can be corrosive. One day you realise your body doesn’t move like it used to, that hills feel steeper, and that your reflection tells a story you don’t quite recognise.

So this is my line in the sand — or rather, my tyre track in the mud. A commitment to reclaim health, to rediscover strength, and to see just how far a heavy man can go with a lighter heart.


The Plan

There’s no secret formula. Just time, discipline, and a bit of stubbornness.

  • Training: Around six hours a week — mostly long outdoor rides, with the odd turbo session when the Derbyshire weather closes in.
  • Nutrition: A lower-carb approach , focusing on counting calories and fuelling fat adaptation rather than sugar highs.
  • Movement: Gentle tai chi to protect my knees and back, and some bodyweight strength work to build resilience.

It’s slow work, but so is any worthwhile climb.


The Vision

I can already picture it — late August 2026, rolling into Kielder after twelve hours of dirt, sweat, and determination. My legs hollowed out, lungs burning, but heart full.

I won’t be racing anyone but myself. The victory won’t be in the time, but in the transformation.

Because at some point, this stops being about cycling. It becomes about identity, agency, and the quiet defiance of saying, I’m not done yet.


This blog will be my record of the road ahead — not just watts, miles, and kilograms, but thoughts, stumbles, and small triumphs. A diary of descent and ascent, in every sense.

And maybe, if all goes well, I’ll find that the man who started this journey — heavy, hesitant, and hopeful — will weigh a little less in every way by the time he crosses that finish line.

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