Six Pounds Down, One Ride Up, and a Head Full of Snot

Well. This week did not unfold exactly as planned.

Let’s start with the good news, because it feels important to acknowledge it before the excuses pile up: I’ve lost 6 lbs this week. That’s not nothing. That’s six actual, real pounds — presumably evaporated through a combination of riding, stress, and coughing up what feels like my entire respiratory system.

Now for the rest of it.

The Week That Wasn’t

Between a brutal opening week back at school, a horrendous cold that has taken up permanent residence in my head, and Storm Goretti deciding that Derbyshire needed a couple of inches of snow, training options narrowed fairly quickly.

As a result, this week’s cycling portfolio looks… minimalist.

Ride One: Snow, Suffering, and Solidarity

I managed exactly one outdoor ride — a short 11-mile snow ride, completed at a majestic just over 8 mph, alongside my brother. Progress was slow, grip was questionable, and style points were firmly off the table.

Still, we got out. We stayed upright. We laughed at how ridiculous it all felt. In winter, that counts as success.

(Photos will follow, partly as evidence and partly because no one believes you unless there’s snow in the background.)

Ride Two: HIIT, Indoors, and Questionable Life Choices

The second session was a 40-minute HIIT workout on ROUVY. Short, sharp, and unpleasant — but effective. The kind of ride where you feel simultaneously pleased you did it and annoyed you ever pressed “start”.

I’ll admit here — quietly — that I’m occasionally using ChatGPT to create workouts. This feels either like a clever use of modern tools or the beginning of the end for structured coaching as we know it. Possibly both.

Still, it got me sweating, breathing hard, and momentarily distracted from the cold, so I’m calling that a win.

The Cold (Still Here, Thanks for Asking)

The cold hasn’t shifted. It’s the sort that doesn’t knock you flat, just lingers — dull headache, blocked nose, low energy, and a general sense that your body would quite like a lie down.

That’s probably why the training volume dropped. That, and the snow. And work. And life. You know how it goes.

What I’m Taking From This Week

Despite appearances, this wasn’t a write-off:

• 6 lbs down is significant, even if it feels slightly suspicious

• I still rode — outdoors and indoors

• I didn’t push through illness like an idiot

• Snow miles count double, morally if not on Strava

• Consistency sometimes looks like survival rather than progress

I’ll be posting a couple of photos and a Strava screenshot with this, partly to document the week and partly to remind myself that even scrappy weeks leave a paper trail.

Next week? Hopefully fewer germs, less snow, and a slightly more convincing training log. But if not, I’ll keep doing what I’m doing: turning up when I can, laughing when it goes wrong, and trusting that the long game still works.

Because it usually does — even when you’re averaging eight miles an hour and breathing like a Victorian invalid.

First Training Ride - Rouvy.

 

First Ride Back After 11 Days — Wakhan Valley and a Grumpy Foot

Well, that took longer than I hoped. Eleven full days off the bike thanks to a delightful little episode of extensor tendonitis — basically my foot’s way of saying, “Mate, sit down before I file an official complaint.”

Today, though, I finally swung a leg back over the bike. Not the gravel beast this time, but my trusty old Boardman road bike, perched on the Thinkrider X5 smart trainer like some ageing warhorse still willing to do its bit. I loaded up ROUVY and picked the Wakhan Valley, Ishkashim – Khorog route in Tajikistan. Because if you can’t climb real mountains when you want to, you might as well sweat all over your garage pretending you are.

Strava link: https://www.strava.com/activities/16724515573

The foot? Still a bit twingey — like it’s clearing its throat to remind me it exists — but honestly, miles better. Pedalling felt mostly smooth, even if I was a bit cautious for the first few minutes. After that, I got into a nice groove: a mix of tempo and threshold, and it actually felt… good. Not “float up the Alps” good, but “yep, I’ve still got some beans to work with” good.

Stats for the ride:

• 12.76 miles

• 43 minutes

• Enough virtual scenery to make me want to book a flight to Tajikistan

• About 500ml of water

• Zero food, because let’s face it — for this length of ride, I’d just be fuelling my guilt

Given the downtime, I’m counting this as my first proper training ride toward next year’s Dolby Devil 160 km. It wasn’t spectacular, it wasn’t heroic, and it certainly wasn’t pretty… but it was a start. And after nearly two weeks crab-walking around the house with a sulky tendon, that feels like a win.

Next step: ease myself back into regular sessions, see how the foot holds up, and resist the temptation to jump straight into overdoing it (again). Slow progress is still progress — even for a heavy, middle-aged bloke with big goals and a slightly sarcastic set of feet.